Uncategorized Archive

  • mid-Northwest_coast_of_United_States_to_Central_South_America_at_Night.ogv

    Special plane to ward off attack by giant female alien

    HEINUS – SEATTLE  Billionaire co-founder of Microsoft, Paul Allen has announced plans to build an ambitious aircraft designed to protect Earth from attack from a giant female alien. The Stratolaunch twin fuselage aircraft, which will be the largest airplane ever built, will fly high into...

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    Jane Austen poisoned? Suspicious ends of famous authors

    Special to HEINUS by Prof. Eugenia Ball, PhD.  A theory that Jane Austen was poisoned has recently emerged in the British press. If true, her untimely end would not be a surprise. In my research, I’ve uncovered many cases of famous authors being involved in...

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    Drinking beer for Lent – Five odd religious devotions revealed

    HEINUS – NEW YORK  An Iowa man plans to drink only beer to observe Lent. Citing the precedent of Franciscan monks who consumed only beer during Lent, J. Wilson reportedly won’t eat food but will drink four pints of beer a day. What are  some...

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    Air Force loses control of 50 nukes, weapons appear on ebay

    The U.S. Air Force lost control of 50 nuclear warheads on the weekend of October 23 – 24. The weapons, mounted on Minuteman III missiles at Warren Air Force in Wyoming, were out of Air Force control for as much as an hour while computers...

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  • Dewy_spider_web

    Goats’ webs snagging hang gliders

    Scientists at the University of Wyoming have discovered a way to genetically engineer genes from  spiders into goats. These genes allow goats to produce spider silk, the material spider’s use to spin webs. While researchers are excited by the development, the spider silk-equipped goats have...

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